God is in the Vagina

I use facebook for a few things. It’s a good source of news updates in science, sustainability, and really whatever I choose. I also use it to watch so many that I went to school with. Watching them I notice a few things.

First is that people get fat. I’m really only twenty to thirty pounds from when I graduated high school many many many many moons ago. Granted I really needed those pounds, way way too skinny, but seriously a lot of them have gotten huge and while I’m a supporter of body acceptance I am also a supporter of healthy lifestyle choices. Now a small percentage of them have health issues and I take that in consideration as well but with each passing year I watch so many of them them get larger and larger.

The second thing I notice is that so many people I went to school with seem to have found god after they have children. The ones that already “knew” god just found more of god after having a child. This leads me to one conclusion, or not really. God is hiding somewhere in the vaginal canal.

Being that I do not have one I can’t claim to be an expert but I started reading and researching human anatomy, especially the female anatomy, when I was in 5th grade. Hey what was a 5th grader supposed to do when you had read through all the books in the small public library…. Move to the college textbooks. On top of all that I’ve raised animals and seen births of animals, watched births of human children on videos, and let’s face it I’ve had partners that I’ve spent some time in between their legs. With all this I’ve never seen a divine light, heard a booming voice, or felt a presence come out of there.

Let’s face it. If that happened I would probably just become a hermit in the woods the first time it happened. Just how scary would that be? Your face down there and a deep booming voice and light hits you! No more playing. Game over man. Cashing out and staying away. That would just be too much. But really imagine that beaming light and booming voice…. No. Done. I need therapy now after that imagination session.

So what gives? Why is it that when people have children all of a sudden they go from questioning religion to finding god? Now it’s not everyone. I just see it a lot. I believe it is guilt and a feeling of “Oh shit I am responsible for another human now.” To me I see these people that did bad things, we all do, and they are suddenly like “I have to be more for this child! I must be the pinnacle of examples!” I don’t believe in that. I do not believe you need to be more for your child. I believe you need to be you in all your flawed glory.

So many parents try to hide what they did as a child. For years my grandparents raised my brothers and I. My grandfather never hid his past from me. He was the leader of a gang, fought regularly, drank, ran away from home, and you know what I respected the man more for this. I was very young when he started telling me these stories and I felt honored even then to be given the chance to see his soul. And I do that now with my fiancee’s children. I don’t hide who I am and what I was. There is no case for morality in this. Just honesty.

I believe another thing happens when someone has a child. I believe they fall back on how they were raised. So those that may have been Atheists that were in a Christian household smash themselves back into a mold that their parents were in. It makes me wonder how many truly believe. How much is it falling back on what is expected because there is no manual on raising a human so they fall back on a known instead of continuing with the unknown.

All and all it’s an amusing thing to watch. Believe if you will. Don’t believe if you will. Harm none with your beliefs, but don’t compromise yourself because that is what you think you should. And always watch out for the booming voice and beaming lights.

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God is in the Vagina

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